On the continuation of expressing my frustration with street harassment, I would like to further point out that street harassment has patriarchal roots and is essentially about maintaining power and control over other human being’s actions and that for people of color street harassment has racial implications. Take these two stories for example:
“On May 19th, 2008 Orlando police say three to four men drove up beside Beaubrun and two of her friends at a red light near the intersection of John Young Parkway and Princeton. The men were asking for their telephone numbers, but the women refused. After being rejected, one of the men fired a shot into the car.
Her friends were uninjured, but Beaubrun was shot in the back and rushed to the Orlando Regional Medical Center in critical condition, where she remained until she died Tuesday.” More information here
or worse:
“Five years ago, Sakia, an African-American 15-year old girl who “dressed like a boy,” was attacked while waiting for a Newark, New Jersey bus after a night out with friends. The girls were approached by two African-American men in a car who made uninvited sexual advances. When the girls declined, stating that they were lesbians, 30-year old Richard McCullough fatally stabbed Sakia while shouting homophobic slurs. She bled out at the intersection of Broad and Market during the wee hours of Mother’s Day morning.” Article is here.
What, besides the urge to physically dominate and control another human being, would prompt another being to take another’s life over rejection? In a world where men are told to day in and day out that they are the bread winners and the head of the household, men who do not fit into the powerful white, hetero, capitalist paradigm may feel powerless and may try to find other means to lay claim to power, ie subjecting another to one’s will. This is where I would like to point out that black women not only have to deal with inter-racial harassment, they have to deal with intra-racial harassment as well. Historically, women of color have always been viewed as sexually approachable beings. White slave masters would sexually terrorize their black female slaves in order to control and induce fear into the slave mentality, white ‘scientists’ othered and hyper-sexualized the black female and objectified her body as one of many means to justify the inhumane treatment of black people, and as result, nowadays white men, with out conscience, can approach black women as prostitutes on the street and get away with it in the courts. This idea of racialized sexist thinking has transcended race and now many black men, instead of questioning the racist implications behind the sexualization of black women, now harass black women as well. Addressing the reason as to why black men can harass black women with ease, bell hooks reasons, ” that when black men harass black women they seek to occupy ‘the position of whiteness’ occupied by white men because men of color are not able to reap the material and social rewards for their participation in patriarchy.” Street harassment ultimately stems from the deeply rooted notion of patriarchy and it allows men of color to ‘rightfully’ exert power and control and falsely boost their sense of self-esteem, while women of color suffer as their scapegoats. Sadly, these men are dealing with psychological issues as a result of low self-esteem. See my self-esteem post.
Also, had you ever heard about these incidents? I am guessing more than likely not. Note that the two above victims and perpetrators were black. Unfortunately, news coverage on black on black violence against women of color is hardly ever as widespread as the coverage is on violence against black women by white men or violence of white women by black/white men. And the same standards apply to Latina women as well. Take for example, the Dunbar Village case where Gem from what about our daughters writes about the gang rape in Dunbar Village of a woman by 10 African American teens who in addition to repeatedly raping the woman ( FOR OVER THREE HOURS) while beating her 12 year old son made them lie naked in the bath tub together and forced the woman to perform oral sex on her own child before burning her skin and blinding her son by pouring cleaning solution on their skin and eyes. They also took cell phone pictures of their deeds and were so brazen that one of these monsters left his condom behind. Surely indicating that they thought they would get away with it. Oh yeah, and the neighbors that didn’t see or hear anything and are currently not talking to police…. Well not a single living thing in this “community ” of folks even bothered to offer a glass of water when this was over. This woman and her blinded son had to trudge to the hospital in the dark on their own.
This behavior abhors me, but I needed to post that in order to give a voice to their story and the countless other horrific stories that go undocumented. My heart goes out to that poor mother and child.
Apologetically, I forgot to offer solutions or alternatives to street harassment in my last post. Here I have included advice taken from the website, stop street harassment, on how to approach a person in public that they find attractive.
How to Talk to Women in Public:
How should a man interact with a woman in public? Politely and repectfully.
Instead of whistling, honking or yelling something about the way she looks as a way of saying hi, treat her like a normal human being and actually say hello and smile or nod. If you want to meet or talk to a woman, follow a similar pattern. Say hello and if she says hello back and doesn’t hurry away, try to politely start a conversation. Don’t touch her or call her names. If she looks busy, distracted, or nervous, leave her alone! She may not have the time or inclination to talk right then. Don’t be rude if she doesn’t talk to you. You don’t know her personal history or what’s on her mind or her schedule. Be respectful of her as a human being.
stay positive and keep talking.
I find your writing to be of great intelligence and incredibly insightful regarding racial and gender issues. However, I think this particular post would be even more effective if it sounded less anti-male and more pro-equal respect. Just an opinion. Regardless, keep writing and informing, the world needs your mind.
I heard about the Sakia Gunn situation. That was messed up, to say the least. Gender PAC (you can do a search on the org) has a campaign now against gender violence for non gender conforming citizens and working to make sure their death are not overlooked. Harassment most certainly always preceeds the murder. It’s systematic.
And to Jimmy Castro: if anything is anti-male, it’s the truth itself. Men continously act like this all over the streets of America and it needs to stopped. Since the problem is invisible in the mas media, ANY intelligent discourse is necessary. And sometimes, posts don’t have to be effective.
[...] power dynamic between men and women, as well as address the unanswered comments from the previous power and control post, and ask readers to offer their own opinions on how to address this imbalance between the [...]
This was an interesting article; I never thought getting ‘hollered at’ was all that serious but I never had a guy chase me down and beat me up for ignoring him either… I used to have to walk to work through a sort-of shady part of town when I was in my early 20s and it happened a lot, not only sexual harassment but just regular harassment as well; I can’t tell you how many permutations of ‘baldheaded b*tch’ I was called just for walking down the street minding my on business. The irony is I think I got off easy because I was female; men I knew in the same situation routinely got glass bottles and other garbage thrown out of car windows at them by these same sort of people
And to the guy who said this was “anti-male” it is that way because women just aren’t the ones doing it, even the garbage thrown at the male pedestrians was always thrown by another man
Wow! this is a great article. Thanks for putting that information out there. I never heard about what happen in the Dunbar village case. That was horrifying, I can’t believe that it didn’t recieve more publicity. But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised…
Thank you so much for writing this piece. I did Don’t Be Silent (http://dontbesilent3.blogspot.com/) for a year, but stopped because it got to be too much to handle on my own and because I dealt with too much online abuse from naysayers and trolls. Street harassment, especially from my so-called “brothas,” happens too often for my tastes. The Black men who harass me see me as nothing more than an object. To them, though I’m dressed conservatively and carry myself with class, these men treat me as if I’m some “video vixen” shaking my butt in the cameras. I’m not “Miss” or “Ma’am,” I’m “Yo, Shawtay!” to them. And if I reject their advances, I go from being “Yo, Sexy!” to “F***ing bitch!” Makes me sick to my stomach. It puzzles me as to why these men are so violent and misogynistic towards women.
I had an incident happen two nights ago where guys were yelling “Yo, Sexy!” to me as I was trying to walk home. When I told them to show more respect and refer to me as “Miss” or “Ma’am,” one of the guys licked his finger and rubbed his nipple with it, and then mooned me. I just feel that Black men don’t respect or care about Black women anymore, and it makes me sick how they’ll call us “Queens” and “sistahs” but don’t treat us as such.
What makes me more upset than the street harassment is the “blame the victim” responses I get from people. My immediate family doesn’t get it. My sister sees no problem with men trying to “holla” on the streets, and my mother thinks I’m overreacting. When I post incidents such as the above-mentioned one on my community’s list serv, women sympathize with me, but men send me private e-mails (they’re too cowardly to post them on the list serv itself) saying “Why does this only happen to you?” and “Just ignore it!” When someone twice your size invades your personal space and won’t leave you alone, then come to me with “Just ignore it!” Whatever.
I’m sorry this comment was so long (at times I feel I should start blogging again to let out steam), but I am so angry that street harassment is accepted as a way of life and what women “have to deal with.” I’m tired of it and I want it to end.